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Law of Attraction 3: Why don’t I get what I want?

In the third of this series, I look at why we don’t get what we want when we’ve asked and think we’re in alignment with our desire and intention. And how do we go about getting what we want? And most importantly, how do we fine tune our thoughts words and actions to be in alignment with our goals?


First of all, let’s look at the actual words used in the statement “Law of Attraction “. This is now a well-known phrase used by many on their quests to achieve their goals. Let’s look at what the words actually mean.

Let’s first of all look at our understanding of the word “Law”

Law definition and meaning | Collins English Dictionary: A law is a rule or set of rules for good behaviour which is considered right and important by the majority of people for moral, religious, or emotional reasons.

And the root of the word law?

"Law" itself comes from the Old Norse root word lag, which means something laid down or fixed.

So, there’s a collective understanding of the word “law” as in terms of the universe, it’s a scientific rule.

And what about the word “attraction?”

Definition of attraction:

: the act, process, or power of attracting

: personal charm

: the action or power of drawing forth a response: an attractive quality

: a force acting mutually between particles of matter, tending to draw them together, and resisting their separation

: something that attracts or is intended to attract people by appealing to their desires and tastes

The Etymology

Attraction is directly from the Latin attractionem (nominative attractio) "a drawing together," noun of action from past-participle stem of attrahere "to draw, pull" (see attract). Extended by c. 1600 to magnetic forces; figurative sense "quality in a person which draws interest or imagination".

So, for attraction to work within this context, the two parts have to have complimentary properties that draw them to each other. So, by that criterion, we can’t have something in our lives that does not have complimentary properties, be it a person a situation or a goal. They have to be complimentary.


At this point I refer us again to the fairy tale

“The Sorcerer’s Apprentice” originally by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe in 1797

The poem begins as an old sorcerer departs his workshop, leaving his apprentice with chores to perform. Tired of fetching water by bucket, the apprentice enchants a broom to do the work for him, using magic in which he is not fully trained. (He actually puts on the Sorcerers pointed hat as if this somehow empowers him with the sorcerer’s magic). Whilst the apprentice sleeps on the job. The floor is soon awash with water, and the apprentice wakes up nearly drowning in what he has created. He soon realises that he cannot stop the broom because he does not know the magic required to do so. In his panic the apprentice splits the broom in two with an axe, but each of the pieces becomes a whole broom that takes up yet another bucket and continues fetching water, now at twice the speed. At this increased pace, the entire room quickly begins to flood. When all seems lost, the old sorcerer returns and quickly breaks the spell. The poem concludes with the old sorcerer's statement that only a master should invoke powerful spirits.

Therefore, we have to be our own master of our thoughts, which create our reality, and through self-knowledge and awareness, we thus earn the Sorcerers hat to wear legitimately.

The Apprentice is like that childlike quality in us, that can become quite inflated about our imagined power. Therefore often, when we intend a goal, and set about attracting the outcome into our lives we get lazy and fall asleep on the job, in other words we rely on the magic, and ignore the reality of the right mindset, and the responsibility involved in taking right actions towards our goals, and allowing the flexibility and intervention of a Master (Divine) that knows better than us to guide us.


The challenge starts with our mindset and lazy thinking. Clear healthy thinking precedes the right words and the right action. So, what do I mean by this?

To co-create with the Divine takes a different kind of thinking, and in a sense is not mind based, but soul based with faith. The spiritual teacher Deepak Chopra describes this beautifully in his book the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success. It’s always helpful to go back to the beginnings, to the origin of thinking around manifestation in all its positive forms.

Deepak Chopra describes the Law of Attraction in three steps. Firstly: Be clear about your desire or your intention. Secondly: Put it in the gap. By this he means let it go, and let your intention be in the field of pure potentiality. This is the step where we have to let go and have Faith, as thirdly he tells us, to let the Universe take care of the details. And this is so often where we stumble as we lose faith and try to make, mould and manipulate a desired outcome, thus narrowing down the amazing possibilities and variants the universe /divine can give us. There’s a fourth part to this which is we have to understand and fully accept the consequences of our intention. Everything has a cost.

So, as we find the right words, and the right actions, it also brings me in mind of astrology, and the different energies assigned to each sign of Cardinal, Fixed and Mutable.

If I use this analogy, then Cardinal is our intent, think of an Aries person you know, you’ll be aware they initiate when they have a goal. They take an action. Then think of Taurus, which is a Fixed sign. They will stubbornly stick to their way of working away towards their goal. Then think of a Gemini, which is a Mutable sign. They have the flexibility of being able to flow with the direction of the most likely outcome for their goal.

So, do we adopt these qualities in our desire to manifest our goals? Well maybe a blend of all three.


But let’s start at the beginning again. Everything begins with a thought. Often so random or quick that we hardly notice it. Our thoughts are the vehicle our intuition can use to connect with us. We could say that in the beginning was a thought, and the thought became the word, and the word was…. (use the word that’s right for you).

Our thoughts are the master key, this is a term that can help us to understand the power of the energy enmeshed in our words.

Lazy critical doubtful thinking will block us on our chosen paths. Fixed thinking, and fixed ideas about the details of our desired outcome. Will also block us.

All these obstacles can prevent us getting what we want, and leave us wondering why we don’t get what we want.


We have to first be very clear about what it is we do want. It’s interesting how many times I ask people what they want? And their answer is that they don’t really know, or they’re unsure about how to attain it. So, we have to dispel the magical energies that can be assigned to the Law of Attraction, and manifestation. The true magic lies within, patiently waiting for us to work with it. It’s always been there, and our inability to fully connect with it is what keeps us locked out.


Right thinking brings results. Once we are able to mindfully choose our thoughts and words with care, starting with the conversations we have with ourselves, then the path to manifestation begins to open up. But we have to know what we want. And we have to look at the consequences of our desire. What is the personal cost to achieve our desire? What right actions do we need to take? This may sound obvious but many trip up at these first hurdles.


Let’s say there’s a certain person you would like a relationship with. Ask yourself these questions. What will my life be like if I was with this person? Is that what I really want? What sacrifices do I have to make to attain this goal? Will it actually make my life richer? Then with the intention clear, you can ask the Divine, (insert your word here) if this particular relationship is in alignment with your Divine path, and for the highest good of all? This is the point many give up, thus not getting what they want, as they don’t add an essential component to the desire, which is, if this person is not on my divine path, send me someone similar or better. This is the deal breaker. This puts you in that win-win situation. And this is what so many people find hard to accept, as they get Fixed, on a certain person, and a certain outcome and deny themselves the serendipity offered by the Divine, who knows better, that there’s something better the Divine has planned for you. Give the responsibility to the Divine, and follow the signs. Giving responsibility over, sets us free, it’s in the trying to make, and the overthinking of the intent, like some mindless mantra that will magically make the person of your dreams, see and want you in the same way. I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again. Would you like to think that another person could manipulate the Universe to make you do what they want?


So, a better way to ask for what you want, in terms of a relationship, would be to say to the Divine. Bring me the best relationship possible for me, with a person who makes my life much richer, as I theirs. And if it’s not on my divine path, to have this, then bring me situations into my life, that give me fulfilment, and love in abundance.

Thinking constantly about your desire will not make it happen any faster, or mean that it will happen within the framework of your fixed ideas. You may well get the person you’ve always wanted, as you battle your way along an impossible path, onto which the Divine is throwing obstacle after obstacle, to prevent you making a big mistake. Then at some point, the Divine will give it to you, as a lesson, and often the price is huge. The saying you’ve made your bed so you must lie on it, aligns with this energy.

But of course, we WILL make mistakes, and get the things, or people we’ve thought we wanted, and they become the lessons, from the Universe that help us grow into our maturity and wisdom. Without them we couldn’t grow.


So ultimately, we have to co-create with the Divine. Have our goals, and intend them, and allow for the flexibility of life to take us where we need to be. We have to know ourselves very well, and be mindful of our thoughts, as they create the reality we experience. We have to have absolute Faith, that the Divine knows better than us, and that if we allow that energy to flow through us, and get out of our own way, and out of the way of the Divine, then we can truly experience the magic of life. And be in the vibration of co-creation with the Universe.

Ref: The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn.

Ref: The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra.

Ref : The Master Key System by Charles F. Haanel

Ref: The Seth Material by Jane Roberts.

Ref : Abraham by Esther Hicks

Law of Attraction 4

How to recognise and deal with our shadow side.

I look at how our shadow side can trip us up at every turn and the importance of recognising our self-destructive patterns. And when it’s time to let go.

Copyright 2021 Penelope Susan Dix. All rights reserved.

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